Random Drabble- Colonial Customer Service

My dream last night... 


Paul Revere was calling into a customer support center for "The British Are Coming" Corporation:


And the automated voice says, "Thank you for calling The British Are Coming call center. If this is an emergency, please hang up and yell "911" immediately on horseback. Your call is very important to us. So that we may better direct your heedful cry, please select one of the following: If the British are coming by land, please press one. If the British are coming be sea, please press two. If you don't know which way the British are coming and need instructions on how to determine if, when, or how the British are indeed coming, please press three. If you are a British solider and would like to confirm, deny, or clarify a report about your coming, please press four. If you previously reported The British are Coming and would like to check on the status of the troop movement, please press five. Note: A tarriff may be charged on your tea for pressing five. Para informar a los británicos vienen en español, por favor marque seis. If you need to talk to a live agent about the British Coming, or have any other questions, please press zero now, or knock on the door of your nearest inn."


This is what happens when I sleep on a tall ship, I guess...

ALBAM ARC Giveaway

Cleaning up more items on my shelves:

I have one - ONE (1) UNO BIR UNE ICHI - "A Love by Any Measure" ARC available to the first person who claims it by leaving a comment with an email address to this post. Remember, ARC copies are pre-release versions that carry with them some copy errors, so keep that in mind. However, if you want it, and can give me a US address to send it to, it's yours.

ARC giveaway

I have four remaining ARC copies of the second edition of 12.21.12. (ARC, remember, which means they'll be some copy errors in thar'.) They've been sitting on my shelves for several months, and I figured it was time to move them along.

So, want them? If so, you can have them. Just leave me an email address below, and I'll contact you to obtain an address. Limit one per person, and  mailing addresses in the United States. First four posts with email addresses get 'em.

Update on Artist warning

After much contemplation, I did something very uncharacteristic of myself and publicly called out artist Robert Quill after having contracted his services in April 2011, and December 2011 having come without receiving any positive work towards that contract. (You can read my original post here.)

I wanted to update you and make you aware that, following this post, Mr. Quill did provide me a link on 12/25 to a proof for my review, after (I believe) he had also been contacted by the organizer of the event at which I initially hired him and after I had made that organizer known of the difficulties we were having. However, having waited so long, I had already began pursuit of other options for my required artwork. Mr. Quill agreed not to contest the reversal on my credit card for his fees that resulted from my reporting them.

It should be reiterated here that my contention, however, was never with the quality of Mr. Quill's artistic work, only with the business acumen I believe he fell flat on.

To my end, I feel the case is resolved in the best possible manner in everyone's interest. I had invited Mr. Quill to offer any commentary on my original post, which he recently did. With his permission, I repost that commentary below.

Well, I certainly never STEAL from anybody. ;)

Hello, this is Robert Quill, and I thank Killian for welcoming my feedback.

Killian is certainly correct that I fell behind on my commission work and email correspondence in 2012. There was a lot of it, I had to contend with a couple of week-long power outages, a close friend was rendered homeless and needed to be taken in, and I was audited by the IRS... and won!... but it took a great deal of time.

Most of my clients have been very patient with me, but Killian, quite justly, asked for a refund, which I granted. Well, technically she processed a chargeback, and I did not challenge it. 

I would like to point out that this sort of thing can happen from time to time. Art doesn't follow predictable timelines, and the work tends to come in waves. For this reason, I don't guarantee delivery times, and Killian signed a Terms and Agreements contract citing this specifically.

However, there were instances when I assured her I would be back in touch in a certain period of time, and then failed to do that, so in this case, I waived those terms and agreed to the refund.

I certainly understand if a reader of this blog might regard this as a cautionary tale. In my defense, let me say I had 450 commission orders in 2011, and have 430 happy customers about 8 unhappy customers and I'm working on the remaining twelve.

I think that's pretty good. :)

Signed copies? Yes, we can (ebooks too!)

Because I'm an indie author who doesn't have much (*cough* any) tour budget, and because many of my readers aren't even located in the US, one of the questions I often get from readers is, "Is there a way to get a signed copies?"

For the past year, I've been trying to find the best way to do this through several different methods. Now, I'm happy to share that you can purchase my books, paperbacks AND ebooks, with a personal dedication and signature. For those of you who already have my books, there's also a way to receive a personalized eBook plate.

For more details, see my "signed copies" page here.

"The Twelve: Altunai Subset One" novelette cover reveal

So, um.... Whaddya think?